Deathsport

In the aftermath of the Neutron Wars, the planet is rendered a bitter wasteland. Mutants roam the countryside. Travelers fear for their lives. Lucrative olive loaf sponsorships are no more. Fortunately, not all heroes were tied up. One man has hung around: David Carradine. Of course, he shows up wearing the loiniest of loincloths, so opinions may differ whether that’s a good thing or not. David and his loincloth get abducted by the sinister Lord Zirpola and forced to compete in Deathsport. The rules are, from what we can tell: Everyone has to wear a stupid helmet. It’s understandably the most popular sport on the planet. Zirpola is suffering from “Brain Decay,” which is what happens when you forget to floss your brain between meals. Carradine sees this as a chance to escape, but he didn’t count on one thing: that Pearl would also serve up a twisted short about hygiene for high school boys. Is there no end to these post-apocalyptic horrors?!